I went wine tasting for the first time this weekend.

Like many people who don't drink I long considered it...well...look, we know the kind of people who get way into their wine. I don't need to describe them.

I almost went tasting last year; I was in the tasting room when someone in the party told me "drinking wine is about growing up and refining your pallet."

And I was like, uh, hell to the no.

So this weekend we tried it again.

You know what, for my money, it tastes like sour grapes.
Annie says it tastes like mushrooms & vinegar.

I don't get how someone can get away with describing a bottle as having the scent of "roofing tar".
1) How is that appetizing?
2) roofing tar has a distinctive smell, and that wine did not smell like it.

(That being said, that was a yummy wine. I think it was the last wine where the taste mattered.)

So, after nursing a pretty gnarly hangover this morning, I've decided that wine isn't all bad. I can see drinking it with a meal. I'll go to more tastings. But I don't know if I can drink it for fun.

Also, dessert wines are totally delicious.

This is what happens.
I'm going to get the mail and I hear or think I hear "Magnet & Steel" coming out of a passing car.

And then the song is stuck in my head.
And then I remember that the song is prominently featured in the movie Boogie Nights.
So I pop in the disc and watch the movie. Cuz, hey, what else am I going to do today?
So I finish the movie and I remember that the directors audio commentary is maybe the best audio commentaries every recorded.
So I watch / listen to that.
Then I say, hey, I'm still not doing anything and have some time to kill so I'm just gonna go ahead and watch the other commentary track featuring many of the actors in which Marky Mark is drunk and discusses having broken his penis (not the prosthetic in the film but the real thing.)
So I watched/listened to that.

And that is how I ended up watching a very long movie three times today because I may or may not have heard a song coming out of someones car.

(On top of that I watched One Flew Over The Cucukoo's Nest. Which damaged me for life when I read the book and saw the movie as a early teenager.)

I discovered this in a pile of books that were donated to the office by a patient.

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We all use the smaller, closer together set of...for lack of a better word...divets on a stapler.

What I want to know is this:

Who uses the other side with the divets that are wider apart and what do they use it for?

Ideas?
Anyone?

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People that know me know that I love gin.
We had a rocky start, gin and I. It's got a unique flavor that can be kind of off putting at first.
Annie describes it as "pine flavored rubbing alcohol".

My love affair with gin started around last Thanksgiving. We had a grand time; gin and I. Ever since it's been a whirlwind romance.

My love affair with fruit started back when I was a kid. I love fruit. I'd eat fruit over many a sweet, sugary treat almost any time.

So when I saw a bottle of "pear infused" gin at the store I couldn't help but try it.

Wet

Now then. I find most booze palatable. I don't like beer, too bitter. Wine is blah, also bitter.
Tastes like sour grape juice.

But this stuff...this Wet by Beefeater....

I tried it out in my standard martini recipe:

2.5 oz gin
1/4 oz  vermouth
stirred
strained
garnished with a lemon peel
 
I use this recipe for all gins, great and small. Bombay right down to the grocery store brand.

Wet by Beefeater though...
Blech.
Is this even gin?
It's terrible.

I purchased a lid for my coffee maker last week. It came today in an average sized box. Inside that box though was a smaller, little box (on the left) that box was wrapped in all the paper pictured on my island.

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Or if you do, at least give me a shout out and send me a copy.

I dawns on me that Shakespeare plays, the tragedies at least could be turned into so great "gangsta" raps.

Think about it. All the elements are there.
Murder, robbery, revenge, betrayal.
I can foresee theme albums.
Hamlet
The Merchant of Venice.

Badass.

Can we get Dr. Dre on this?
Or even Doc Pop. Anyone with a PHD that can make a beat.

(BTW, picture is unrelated)

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From January 1 to June 1 2009 I "read" 34 books. I would have made 35 (should've been "Candide") but Friday was crazy and didn't go as I planned. Now it'll be my first book for the second half of 2009.

Below is the title of the book, the author, the narrator then my score of the book and the narration.

Diary - Chuck Palahniuk - Read by Martha Plimpton - 6, 8
In Cold Blood - Truman Capote - Read by Scott Brick - 6, 7
Live and Let Die - Ian Fleming - Read by Robert Whitfield - 7, 6
Year of Living Biblically - AJ Jacobs - Ready by AJ Jacobs - 6, 5
The Corrections - Jonathan Franzen - Ready by Dylan Baker - 4, 7
Moonraker - Ian Fleming - Read by Robert Whitfield 8, 8
The Stranger - Albert Camus - Read by Jonathan Davis - 7, 6
Interpreter of Maladies - Jhumpa Lahiri - Read by - Matilda Novak - 10, 8
Deacartes' Bones - Russell Shorto - Read by Paul Hecht - 7, 5
Kidnapped - Robert Louis Stevenson - Read by Ralph Coshman - 10, 8
The Astonishing Life of Octavian Nothing, Traitor to the Nation, Volume II: The Kingdom on the Waves - MT Anderson -  Read by Peter Francis James - 6, 8
Moll Flanders - Daniel Defoe - Read by Virginia Leishman  - 7, 7
All The Pretty Horses - Cormac McCarthy - Read by Frank Muller - 10, 10
Diamonds are Forever - Ian Fleming - Read by Robert Whitfield - 7, 8
Manhunt - James L. Swanson  - Read by Jonathan Davis  - 7, 6
The Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas - Read by John Lee - 9, 7
The Namesake - Jhumpa Lahiri - Read by Sarita Choudhury - 10, 9
From Russia With Love - Ian Fleming - Read by Robert Whitfield - 7, 8
Cities of the Plain - Cormac McCarthy - Read by Alexander Adams - 7, 5
The Crossing - Cormac McCarthy - Read by Alexander Adams - 7, 5
Unaccustomed Earth - Jhumpa Lahiri - Read by Sarita Choudhury and Ajay Naidu - 9, 8
Morality In Our Age - Human & Civil Rights - Read by Robert Guillaume - 7, 4
Morality In Our Age - War & Terrorism - Read by Robert Guillaume - 6, 4
Morality In Our Age - Civility & Community  - Read by Robert Guillaume - 6, 4
Founding Brothers - Joseph J. Ellis - Read by Nelson Runger - 4, 2
Atlas Shrugged -  Ayn Rand - Read by Christopher Hurt - 7, 4
Dr. No - Ian Fleming - Read by Robert Whitfield - 7, 8
Blood Meridian - Cormac McCarthy - Read by Richard Poe - 5, 8
Botany of desire - Michael Pollan – Read by Scott Brick - 7, 7
Shadow of the wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafón - Read by Jonathan Davis - 7, 6
Coraline - Neil Gaiman - Read by Neil Gaiman - 9, 7
Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole - Read by Barrett Whitener - 7, 4
On the Road -  Jack Kerouac - Read by Matt Dillon - 6, 8
Bridge to Terabithia - Katherine Paterson - Read by Tom Stechschulte - 10, 10

Obviously Frank Muller & Tom Stechschulte are two of my favorite narrators.
Muller & Stechschulte have these deep, manly voices that are best when paired with characters with southern accents. Yet their voices are...supple...enough to do fair depictions of women and children. I would listen to them read anything, including the clichéd phonebook.

I've been listening to audiobooks on a regular basis for about a year now and I've noticed that then they need a black voice the go-to guy is Peter Francis James. He has a great voice. Even and mellow. I think the best book I've heard him narrate is "Invisible Man" which I listened to late last year.

Sarita Choudhury has a great English/American/Indian accent that is perfect for her work reading Jhumpa Lahiri. Lahiri writes with so much sadness, alienation and displacment; Choudhury converts that from the page to spoken word so well.

Nelson Runger's reading of "Founding Brothers" was among the most boring things I've ever listened to. I mean I had to force myself through it. I didn't care for the book either but a good narrator can make a boring book a little more exciting but pairing a boring book with a boring narrator; ZzzZzzZzzZzz....It's a shame because the founding fathers were very interesting and you can get a good sense of that in this book but it's just so dry. When I finished it and found out that it won a Pulitzer I was shocked.

The narration of Alexander Adams just bores me. His voice bothers me; high and nasaly. Blah.

The Cristopher Hurt reading of "Atlas Shrugged" was off. I couldn't put my finger on what exactly was wrong with it. His voice work was good overall but it just didn't move me. The production quality of the recording wasn't very good so that didn't help the already weak narration. Later this month I'll listen to his "The Fountainhead" and see how that goes.

I listened to "On the Road" because I felt I needed to. I started it in high school and it bored me then and it mostly bored me now. I kind of like how Kerouac writes, I dig that free style but I just don't care for the beat lifestyle and the people in the book; they people just bothered me, careless fools. I did groove on the narration by Matt Dillion though. I was a little nervous going into it, I don't really get down with him as an actor but I think his voice was perfect for the New York / New Jersey-Italian narrator of the book.

I read "Coraline" because I saw the movie and loved it. I saw it twice. I really liked the book and movie. It's a near perfect fairy tale. Magical.

"Bridge to Terabithia". Another one where I saw and loved the movie and had to read the book. Saddest book ever. I knew what was going to happen in the end and that didn't lessen the sadness. According to the American Library Association it's in the top ten of the most challenged books. I feel like I understand why but those people can suck it. This book is great. It's awesome. It's one of my favorite books. This book makes me want to have kids so they can read this book, fall in love and have their hearts broke.


In the next six months I hope to finish all of the James Bond books.
I will get through all of the "Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy" series (which I've read about half of) in time for the release of the new book. I'll get through a few more of Time's 100 best English language novels since 1923; I've already read 16 of them (I want to re-read about 5 of that number) and have another 15 or 16 waiting for me to make time for them.

I'm also going to be refocusing my efforts on the "classics". I've got a huge stack of them that I feel like I've let fall by the way side recently; "Moby Dick", "Don Quixote", "Robinson Crusoe". Books where you can almost smell the dust when you read the title.

Bought a channel knife today

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No...wait. Seriously.

(SUBTITLE: I <3 Wikipedia. Or; How a martini taught me about the Corsican Flag.)

When I was in the 8th grade my history teacher tried to recruit me into the GATE class (I turned her down). She said my mind was like a sponge. That I just absorbed information.

Without sounding like a pompous ass; that might be the most astute observation about my personality ever made. I do love information and I try to get my hands on as much as possible.

Despite what people think of it, Wikipedia is the perfect tool for gathering information, random bits of it, things that you would never learn about other wise.
This is one of those stories.

I bought a new bottle of vermouth today.
It's a special bottle "for a fruitier martini".
I looked on the Martini & Rossi website for recipes but didn't find any so I turned t the web. Among my results was a Wikipedia entry about vermouth. So I clicked it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vermouth

When I was done with the article I saw at the bottom there was a link to an article about the "History of Alchol"
I clicked it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_alcohol

When I was about half way done with it I noticed a chart depcitcing "alcohol per capita comsuption"

I clicked it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Countries_by_alcohol_consumption

I said "Uganda? Really?"
Uganda has the highest rate of alchol comsuption in the wold. almost 19.5 liters per person per year.
The United States is way down at #43.

Then I spent a little while reading about Uganda. Oh yeah, Idi Amin. You should check out the documentary about him "General Idi Amin Dada: A Self Portrait" I saw it a few years back. That dude was crazy. I still haven't seen the movie with Forrest Wittiaker about him.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uganda
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Idi_Amin
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/General_Idi_Amin_Dada:_A_Self_Portrait

Then I went back to the list and I emailed it to my friends.

I was reviewing it again and noticed that there is a country in the top ten called Réunion.
I was like, WTF? Réunion? I've never heard of such a place and they have the same flag as the French.

So I clicked it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Réunion

So I was reading all about Réunion and I notitced that Réunion is in NUTS Region FR9.
What? NUTS?
That's right. I clicked it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/First_level_NUTS_of_the_European_Union

I got down to France and noticed there was a subdivison called "Corse" and I thought "Corsica! Napolean!!"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Corse

I was intrgued by the flag of Corsica. So naturally I clicked on the Corsican flag to learn more about it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flag_of_Corsica

And that, friends, is how I learned all about the Corsican flag because I wanted a Martini.

And I ended up drinking a mai tai anyway.